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- Adam Feb 23, 2016 at 17:08 Hey, I can see straight to the back of your head when I look into your eyes! Voice command: Alexa, I am your father. 2 I'm Still on the Right Side of the Grass As long as you're still breathing, you can use this reply. Before you complain about anything, be thankful for your life and the things that are still going well.". Oftentimes, these people just cant help but stick their noses in things they actually have no business with. You sure have a bodacious rackfor a guy. Perhaps you said something as egregious as Hey. Well, I was trying to be invisible but I guess that didnt work. My bad, its just your mouth. How do you think that I am doing? Youre worse. This is the perfect time for you to become a missing person. 36. "The trouble with quotes about death is that 99.9% of them are made by people who are still alive." (Heres What To Do), Roommate Sleeps in Living Room All The Time! 98. The fact youve replied at all has come as a shock. I was hoping you would be able to tell me that. All rights reserved. Wondering How You Are 1 I'm Better on the inside than I Look on the outside This one works well when you're still in your pajamas or are having a bad hair day. Because your ass is out of this world! You nervously reply "yeah, but I'm a little busy and-", only for one person to reply "um, no one asked you. Try a Humorous Reply when Someone Asks "How Are You?" - All Women's Talk Scroll down! It could be raining men, and Id still be single. 2. Here's one to use when you're having a spectacular day. The music billboard charts got it wrong! [deleted] 5 yr. ago. You know when you go to meet some friends, or friends of your friends, or to a party or whatever, when you meet someone new, at some point people ask you: "SO WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?" And what I wanted to do in this thread is list the craziest answers that you can give, you know, shock people or create an extremely awkard moment. Maybe they had a giant project at work and lost contact with all their friends and loved ones. It may come across as insensitive, but that's just how our current world works. Still, the ghosters ghost on. Once youre dead, youre made for life. Jimi Hendrix (musician), Death will be a great relief, no more interviews. Katharine Hepburn (actress), Death is a delightful hiding place for weary men. Herodotus (historian), You know youre old when the candles cost more than the cake. Bob Hope (comedian), Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them. EW Howe (author), There are more dead people than living, and their numbers are increasing. (Say it like he or she is complimenting you even though he or she is not.) 3. It was also revealed that 40% of users who said they had done the ghosting did so because they simply didnt know how to explain their disinterest and felt that disappearing altogether was less hurtful. Voltaire (philosopher), "As you get older, three things happen. 66. The answer is simple. Learn more about us here. Why dont you tell me, you seem to have a pretty good view from there. Want to equip yourself with more responses? Sort: Relevant Newest # living # seth meyers # im here # its me # lnsm # tired # dead # shot # arrows # loser # hello # hi # hey # tap # listen # alive # pearl jam # eddie vedder # i'm good # i'm ok Make sure the person you say this to is able to take a joke. Hemali Adhiya, ICF Certified Relationship Coach, Expertise: Relationships, Marriage, Couples, Grief, Life Coaching, Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Because you havent put a ring on it yet. With a self-assured stance and casual body language, you won't create any . 13 Wildly Successful People Answer the Question: "What Do You Do?" 35 Auto Reply Text Message Ideas: Funny, Professional, Effective I'm used to it, anyway. When you're mad, but don't want to ruin your impression, this is a nice way to reply to your crush or match. Maybe you can Google it. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. 64. It must have been a long, lonely journey. 35. You look tired. Acting like a prick doesnt make yours grow bigger. Because apparently, you need to go outside and talk to people to date. I dont tell you how to live your life, dont tell me how to live mine thanks. Are those space pants? 100 Funny and Witty Quotations About Age and Getting Older - Holidappy Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. Trying to remember the name of that weird person you remind me of. Are you always this dumb, or are you making a special effort today? How much do you charge to deliver an STD? Is It A Bad Idea To Lose My Virginity To An Old Crush? If you want, Ill give you a discount, baby. All you have to do is save this page, or commit to memory some of our favorite insults from the following list, and youll be all set. Do you have a minute? is perfect for lunch-time banter with colleagues. Totally fine! Haha use this humorous response to make someone laugh-you never know, you just might brighten their day. Whether you're in the jury or on the witness stand or on trial yourself, it's a tense and nail-biting environment. To answer that question, I need to take you back about 12 years. 3. I didnt realize it at first, but I grew up and turned into a Squidward. Because I prefer the company of dogs/cats rather than humans. Theres this one time when a cute guy/gal asked me if I have a boyfriend/girlfriend and I said yes because I didnt hear the question. . Share the best GIFs now >>> The friendly ghost would never leave you hanging. While most of us answer with an uninspired I am fine, thank you, the universal greeting question how are you? This means that when they get super excited, it can cause their heart to beat too fast, which causes death. Is my relationship status a joke to you?! "I'm alright, mate". 9. I only fall in love with anime characters. There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. Thats why Im single. If I was any better, vitamins would be taking me. 382 Likes, 344 Comments. Could have been worse, right. For your information, Im in a relationship with food. Spiritually? Let them know that you're itching to go on a date. Nikhil Saluja, "Immortality . People will often tell you Im too busy to text you back. More like give me a sign that you're still alive. This way, youre insulting themand they just might be dumb enough not to notice. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. And trust us, once you use these lines, everyone will be ooh-ing to your snarky comments the next time someone dares to make fun of you! Be Thankful To Be Alive Quotes. It looks a little too clingy and hard to maintain. This one is funny when you havent said anything. Whats a funny way to respond to the question 'Are you still alive?' You'll love these 67+ Sarcastic Instagram Captions for couples, friends [Read: 30 foolproof pickup lines and 10 you should never ever use]. Stop joking! Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Here, there are hilarious replies, witty comebacks, flirty responses, and many other answers to this question. 76 Best Replies and Answers to How Are You Doing? - Trending Us Get your own life first before you try sharing it. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. Single is the new blackif that even makes sense! 100+ Funny Things to Ask Alexa (with its Hilarious Responses) - ITTVIS Now you can be! 3. 20. Hmmph. 71. via: Pexels / George Pak. Id rather have a doughnut on my finger than a real ring. Then you die. Still Alive GIFs - Find & Share on GIPHY Thats because my husband/wife wont let me date. What is the polite way for asking if someone is still alive? Getting better with every passing second. Some good old fashioned sarcasm, there is nothing wrong with it. This one is bound to get a laugh. Whatever your thoughts on death may be, I hope you enjoy these random humorous quotes about mortality, death, and dying. 28 Witty Responses To Ghosting That'll Haunt Them Forever - Bustle How did you get here? 20 Perfect Responses To Send When Your Ex Texts You - Vixen Daily Humans are sophisticated beings, but we are also creatures of habit who say one thing while we mean something else. When someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel like an empire could have risen and fallen in that time. Whats with all these questions? Theres only one problem with your face: I can see it. Oh, a thought crossed your mind? Theres too much Ghostbusters texting potential to not take advantage of the pun-tastic opportunity. On the plus side, a little humor injected into someones day can have a positive impact on their otherwise average day! *wink*. But, as soon as we feel better, that person no longer serves their purpose. Looking at my life, half the time I see that I don't live half of what I should! You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. Some people are going to find your witty responses funny, and some people arent. I thought you already knew you were a sociopath. We found the best coronavirus memes about social distancing, toilet paper, homeschooling, as well as ways to spread a little more kindness. I cant even afford to feed myself! You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the. Listen, maybe your crush really did lose their phone. Best "How Are You?" Answers. upstart loan login; jim bell siloam mission salary; . What do you say when people ask you that? Im sorry I hurt your feelings. Perhaps it will encourage them to respond quicker in the future. I dont think youre an idiot but whats my opinion compared to countless others? 100. Youre not going to use the same response to your dad as you would your best friend, right? 81. Sounds like effort to me. 92. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two." I always root for the little guy. Maybe I am a kindergartner? I used to think you were a pain in the neck. Voice command: Alexa, define rock paper scissors lizard Spock. Oh, stop it, will you? Maybe they like you so much that it triggered some kind of reaction that ended their life. Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. 75. If you knock on my hearts door, I might let you in. Firing back with something a little funny or witty will make them take notice! At minding my own business? Because nowadays, the industry prefers singles over albums. Whoever cast a voodoo spell on my love life can chill now. 1. I am doing wellor that could be my anti-depressants speaking. The hottest single of the year is me. Did someone leave your cage open? You may join me, though. bluntz strain indica or sativa; best mobile number tracker with google map in nepal 57. Why do you ask? I am not sure what you mean. 8. Dont wake me up yet. If someone clearly doesnt want to talk to you, the best thing to do is not talk to them. Hey, whered you get that nose? Just look what happened there! Often, we text some people when were at rock bottom, to try and get their help, or just have someone to talk to. We all grow up as we get older. 86 Funny and Flirty Responses To 'How Are You Doing?' - Monk at 25 If you like me, send them while Im alive. Brian Clough (football team manager), I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure. Clarence Darrow (lawyer), Millions long for immortality who dont know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon. Susan Ertz (author), In this world, nothing can be certain, except death and taxes. Benjamin Franklin (inventor), Life is hard. Definitely will catch your casual convo counterpart off guard and will probably bring a chuckle. Nevertheless, life must go on, and sometimes you just have to go with the flow, as they sayeven if you don't want to discuss your relationship status! Alive Jokes. Not bad. Your friends will expect you to say "fine" or "good," so shake things up by providing an unexpected answer. Do you have a minute? But, if they were, it would be a valid reason for them taking so long to reply. Sure isnt my pay, Im still pretty broke. Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. funny response to are you still alive. Watch the video: Only 1 percent of our visitors get these 3 grammar questions right 30 Best Responses To An Apology For A Late Reply. Don't Push It Too Far. It depends on what or who I compare myself to. I hope you are at your best too. 13. I only went to the gym four times instead of my usual five." Sarcastic response: "Yeah totally. 2. Who knows, they might just do it. If your crush asks you how you are, you might as well be honest. 28. I love you. . The answer to this question has become so generic it feels like there is an auto-complete machine in our heads! Let's grab a drink" 3) "Hey, how was that [insert something specific she mentioned when you met her]?" 4) "You can stop worrying about me I made it home safely last night" Id sue my parents if I had a face like yours. This person is taking so long to reply, you will be waiting for geology to change before you get one. Maybe because I like pineapples on my pizza? Which just make the unexpected moments of levity all the more hilarious. They really care for you, and you better value their presence well. If ugliness was measured in bricks, I would be the Great Wall of China. While using humor and creativity in your responses is fun, ensure you steer clear from using puns related to religion and sensitive topics. How do you want me to be? Despite not being the most popular topic of conversation, the concept of death has inspired quite a few clever and insightful sayings over the years. 4. Its no secret that essays take longer to write than typical text messages. funny response to are you still alive 09 June 2022. no disease, including cancer, can exist in an alkaline environment / siberian husky mask types Are you going to help me have a good day? Welcome to Grammarhow!We are on a mission to help you become better at English. "See, I will finally make you smile.". It is a basic courtesy that when one of your leads converts to a paying customer, you demonstrate your gratitude and make their transfer as smooth as possible. 20 Funny Out-of-Office Messages to Inspire Your Own [+ Templates] - HubSpot Boom. 90 Sarcastic Quotes for Witty Comebacks Full of Sarcasm - Quote Ambition Because youre highly qualified. It would be easy to answer that question with a simple "I'm fine, thank you.". 1. Comeback for "oh you still alive".. : Comebacks - reddit What is the most creative reply to, are you still alive? Im sorry. Rotting flesh is less offensive than you. "You know I can do this anytime.". Take Your Time. Because they are already taking their time. 6. This one could be a funny or cute response to sorry for a late reply, based on how they take it. Yes, believe it or not, it really does happen. In fact, they're taking too much of it. But it can be funny. Could be payday. Paul Levesque (Triple H), pro wrestler & VP at WWE "It's funny now because I'm kind of in this weird kind of combo twilight zone of the last bits of my in-ring . Its better to be single with high standards than be in a relationship settling for less. The data will take longer to reach Earth than it would if it was sent from someone on Earth. conservation international ceo; little debbie peanut butter creme pies discontinued. Your 3rd @ has one shot to make a three or you die. I dont follow boys/girls because theyre not my passion. 4. He has six years of experience in professional communication with clients, executives, and colleagues. Sometimes, being emotional stops us from replying to the messages of others. Every civilisation has its genesis and its conclusion. Like for your friends and close ones, here are some witty responses and replies to make them laugh, because they know exactly how you're doing and ask you as par of formality. Why some QAnon believers think JFK Jr is still alive - and about to I am feeling so good that I have to sit on my hands to stop myself from clapping. Better inside than outside. I dont think youre stupid. Here's the good news: I've collected plenty of answer options for you to make that unbearably awkward question a little more bearable. The best I can be. Your attempt at social interaction to be polite is hereby acknowledged. 100+ Funny and Clever Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?" How to Respond to An Insult With Humor? 41+ Best Comebacks If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. Who knows, maybe you can steer a conversation in a more intriguing path. My grandfather had a ton of these. 87. Holy s**t, you can see me?! 32. Funny Responses to "What Are You Doing?" What does it look like I'm doing? What Is A Micro Wedding And How To Plan It? 95+ Heartwarming Alive Jokes | buried alive, stayin alive jokes If your best friends are worrying about you due to your new break up, this one you can use to make them feel relaxed. 29. The foundation of any effort to get your ex boyfriend back starts and ends with the no contact rule - which means you probably shouldn't be texting with him in the first place. I'm Not Sure How to Answer That!? Why Give a Funny Response to an Everyday Question? If someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel much longer than it is. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. Im reminded of how unfair life is every time I see you. Do you really care? 3. What if questions can help you form connections fast, but you don't want to rush or force it. You a cop? 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Maybe their roommate was sick. I cant really complain, but I will still try. I dont mind you talking so much, as long as you dont mind me not listening. I think it's a great response when you're possibly feeling cranky. Well, I have to go to work so Ill try and make the best of it. I'd rather answer to a 'What's your favorite "I'd rather die" response alternative' thread on reddit. Arthur lived a short life, but none could doubt that it was a good one. Maybe because I have a Ph.D. in impatience. The best GIFs are on GIPHY. Do you want the short or the detailed version? Because if you are, youre doing it right. So perhaps the issue is not that they are taking a long time to reply. 11. #19: Bumble comeback The best comeback text yet. 90. Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on January 20, 2020: Shing Araya from Philippines on January 08, 2020: All are witty and funny at the same time. 4. Sure, we all have things to do, but when someone takes two days to reply, that is a sign that they are the problem. Elon Musk targets Bernie Sanders over tax tweet: 'I keep forgetting that you're still alive' The Twitter spat was in response to Sanders' demand that "the extremely wealthy pay their fair share." 19 Funny Texting Comebacks To Always Come Out On Top - TextGod.com | Are you surviving? Maybe because I clap my hands when the credits roll at the end of a movie? They were not expecting someone so wonderful to talk to them. Synonyms for Still Alive (other words and phrases for Still Alive). I laugh at my own jokes before I finish them. So, you changed your mind? 1. No, they're prison pants. (Wriggle your hips), Oh, stop it, will you? "Hey You, I'm really good. Spiritually? Here's a 13-second video explaining how Jennifer Lawrence uses this Surprise Theory: You might just find one. Privacy Policy. If this doesnt cause them to reply, then maybe you should rethink your friendship with this person. Your hair looks great! I really thought you already knew. 76. 33 very creative insults to intellectually insult someone with your sarcasm, How to be a fun texter and make anyone laugh while reading your texts. Hanging by a thread. I hate looking at my life and seeing that some of the people that are most important to me aren't here anymore! I do admite that sometimes I hate life, sometimes my hate being in the world! I'm afraid I can't do that. You don't need to say it. Break the cycle, rise above, focus on science! Shooting yourself in front of the person who asked. The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. still alive 810 GIFs. If you're stuck in a cycle with your ex of being on and off again, but you know it's not going to work out, don't respond. I am the hurricane setting fire to the forests at night when no one else is alive or awake however you choose to see it and I live in my own flames sometimes burning too bright and too wild to make things last or handle myself or anyone else and so I run. You don't want others to assume that you feel as horrible as you look, so this is the way to set them straight. For some reason, some people think that not texting back is cool. 42. [Read: 20 things you MUST know to master a dry sense of humor]. My only talent is not being in a relationship. Grab a few of these snarky but oh-savage good comebacks ahead of time, and youll be ready to win any argument. If you're brain-dead, you're dead. Well, Im hoping its going to get a lot better, I cant lie. If you don't want to explain how you're feeling, then don't. Maybe you said something so vile, so horrible, so disgusting that they no longer want to speak to you. 34 Best Responses To Late Replies (While Texting) Haha basically a sassy way to say, "I'm still alive." No one will expect to hear it, so you'll be catching your friends off guard. Alexa's response: I'm sorry, Dave. Because Id rather be alone than put up with someones sh*t! 24. I'm overqualified! Of course, you don't want to brag, which is why this funny line is useful. My favorites were: "I'd rather have bamboo shoots shoved under my toenails." "I'd rather be in hell with both arms cut off." He was an angry, creative man. This does not seem right. "Can't complain" is a normal response to the question, but by throwing in the following sentence, you should get a laugh. Why would you talk to someone at their convenience when they wouldnt speak to you when you needed them.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_2',106,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_3',106,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');.medrectangle-3-multi-106{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:50px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}.